Cloud Cuckoo Land at No.10

"Did you hear it?" Arturo asked.

"Hear what?" I hadn't a clue what he was on about.

"The cuckoo!" he chuckled. "No neither did I, mi old mate, but I tell you this - we're right in the middle of Cloud Cuckoo Land here in Downing Street!"

Now - let me explain what had made Arturo come to this conclusion. Before the Leader of the Opposition got involved at Prime Minister's Questions, this was heard from Richard Bacon Conservative MP for South Norfolk:

On Monday morning at Norwich research park, I thought I heard the sound of a cuckoo, which was remarkable since we have not even reached Christmas, let alone spring. Does the Prime Minister agree that this may be further evidence of the strength of our long-term economic plan?

The Prime Minister: I was delighted to meet my hon. Friend and other Norwich MPs at Norwich research park

http://www.publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm201415/cmhansrd/cm141203/debtext/141203-0001.htm

I really couldn't believe my ears. Richard Bacon commenting about a cuckoo heralding 'the strength of our long-term economic plan'. He and the Prime Minister clearly live in Cloud Cuckoo Land which the Oxford English Dictionary defines as:

A state of absurdly over-optimistic fantasy

http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/cloud-cuckoo-land

Now - if he'd heard a wise old owl - that would have meant something - but a cuckoo!! It shows you the sorry state of affairs of British politics today that they have to resort to cuckoos!

Prime Minister's Questions was the usual knock-about performance one has come to expect. However, what we were all waiting for was the much heralded Autumn Statement from 'Georgy' Osborne. Everyone was in their place - or were they? There was one notable exception - 'Wailing Lad' Clegg, the Deputy Prime Minister. And where was he? The BBC reported that:

The deputy prime minister said he chose to "talk to normal people" in Cornwall.

He told LBC he was not "sheepish or ashamed" of what Chancellor George Osborne announced.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-30326161

There you have it! From out of one of the cuckoo's beaks! He went to "talk to normal people". Ipso facto, MPs are not 'normal people'! Well, you said it, Deputy Prime Minister!

Arturo and I have not yet digested the full facts of 'Georgy' Osborne's Autumn Statement - neither of us has an economics degree - but maybe that's no bad thing! However, the Institute for Fiscal Studies, who arguably do understand such things were quoted in The Guardian by Phillip Inman. The headline was:

Osborne’s spending cuts will change state ‘beyond recognition’, says IFS

The article quoted the IFS Director, Paul Johnson:

“... it is surely incumbent upon anyone set on taking the size of the state to its smallest in many generations to tell us what that means. How will these cuts be implemented? What will local government, the defence force, the transport system, look like in this world? Is this a fundamental re-imagining of the role of the state?”

Later the article quoted Johnson:

“We calculate that, just to keep the pace of departmental spending cuts over the next parliament to that which has been achieved over this parliament – that is cutting at just over 2% a year – would require welfare cuts and or tax rises of about £21bn a year by 2019-20.”

Phillip Inman ended the article with a comment from Frances O'Grady, general Secretary of the TUC:

“The chancellor now wants us all to pay the price for his failure by cutting public services down to a stump with the loss of a million jobs.”

http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/dec/04/george-osborne-spending-cuts-change-state-beyond-recognition-ifs

So this Cloud Cuckoo Land ain't Utopia! No siree, if Paul Johnson is correct when he says: "... just to keep the pace of departmental spending cuts over the next parliament to that which has been achieved over this parliament – that is cutting at just over 2% a year – would require welfare cuts and or tax rises of about £21bn a year by 2019-20." To me and Arturo this sounds a regular Dystopia! A world in which the poor just get poorer even if the rich get richer!

Arturo was looking thoughtful, then he said: "All this reminds me of the story about the South American Dictator who, when he addressed the downtrodden people, announced:

"When I took over this country - we stood on the edge of a precipice. I can now tell you, we have taken a big step forward!"

Arturo is right! This country is on the edge of a precipice, isn't it? And now .....? We all know what lies at the bottom of a precipice!

Hang on a minute! I thought I saw a bird flying passed the window. Could this be Richard Bacon's fabled cuckoo? No. I think it was a vulture flying over Downing Street!

Before the calamity hits us all, me and Arturo are going out to cheer ourselves up! We're off to have a bit of coq-au-vin with Anatole, Arturo's second cousin!

Bye