Posh boys still rule - but not OK @ No 10

So - the party conference season has come and gone. It has been quiet for Arturo and me in the corridors of Downing Street. The rats and mice had a great time gobbling up the fancy leftovers from the kitchen floors of Nos 10 and 11. Then, we rounded up old Larry and caught the lot of them!

Arturo and I settled down by the TV to watch 'Georgy' Osborne give his speech. A pretty dismal performance. 'Georgy' kept nodding his head in total agreement with himself. He was reminiscent of one of those 'nodding dogs' - particularly bulldogs - who sit on the rear shelves of cars. He had the same hapless look and pleading eyes as if begging for a pat on the head from his Boss! Instead, we expect he got a kick up the ar** the next day when the IMF published its figures on the UK economy!

The Boss man himself prepared to give his speech after the much applauded, pantomime performance of 'Mop Head' Johnson. Arturo and I noticed that the make-up artists who strive to give Cameron the orange-glow of virility had opted for a new look. Seldom have I seen such a thick layer of pale gunge plastered on 'Boy David' Cameron's face! It contrasted rather starkly with the remnants of the orange-glow from his neck and the purple of his tie! Arturo ventured to suggest that it had been applied so that he looked like one of the 'sickly plebs' so despised by the Chief Whip.

After all as Arturo said:

"The NEETS (Not in Education, Employment or Training) are starving and cold - so the PM had better look like they do, as well - a great vote-catcher that! It's known as the sympathy vote!"

A tad cynical, I thought - but then again ...

The Cameron speech was not a thrilling theatrical moment though it was full of PR phrases:

Though the challenge before us is daunting, I have confidence in our country. Why? Because Britain can deliver. We can do big things. We saw it this summer. The Jubilee, the Olympics, the Paralympics... the best country in the world..

Now that got them on their feet! Good bit of PR there! But there was more to come! Knowing the popularity of the 'Mop Head', the PR man that is Cameron knew he had to bite the bullet so he referred to him in the following terms:

..the zinger on the zip-wire...the Conservative Mayor of London: our Boris Johnson.

Note the 'our'! Clever stuff that!

Now down to the nitty-gritty! 'Our' 'Boy David' had declared himself a passionate supporter of the NHS. What would he say now - now that it is in tatters! He said:

To all those people who said we'd bring the NHS down...I say...well, yes, you've got a point. I'll tell you what is down.

Waiting lists - down. Mixed wards - down. The number of managers - down. Bureaucratic targets - down. Hospital infections - down.

And what's up? The number of doctors, the number of dentists, the number of midwives, the number of operations carried out in our NHS.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/conservative-party-conference-2012-in-birmingham-full-transcript-of-david-camerons-speech-8205536.html

Now that had them all cheering in the serried ranks of the great Tory backwaters! But the truth - the truth, Mr Cameron, is rather different! The NHS is 'down'. It's not quite 'down and out' but almost. As the following blog pointed out:

* South London Healthcare Trust * Mid Staffordshire Trust * Peterborough and Stamford Trust

The three Trusts above are perilously close to being broken up and sold off to private companies. South London & Mid Staffordshire FTs are already in administration & Peterborough looks set to follow that way at Christmas. ... Among those reporting an interest were Virgin Care and Serco. If the deals were 10 year Franchises like Hinchingbrooke, it could mean the tendering of up to £4.5bn of services in South London alone. Mid Staffs sell off could lead to up to £2bn of services being sold off. Peterborough is not quite there yet but Circle Healthcare have identified it as a Trust that they see themselves in with a chance of taking over. The 3 large Foundation Trusts listed above are on the brink of being broken up and sold off to varying degrees. We will begin to hear of the plans for South London in the next fortnight.

http://eoin-clarke.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/view-nhs-trusts-facing-franchise.html

So, "Yes, Prime Minister!" It was fitting that you put on the whey-faced stance! The orange-glow of your normal look would have turned a nasty shade of beige when you said:

So be in no doubt: this is the party of the NHS and that's the way it's going to stay.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/conservative-party-conference-2012-in-birmingham-full-transcript-of-david-camerons-speech-8205536.html

I asked Arturo what score he would have given 'Boy David' for his performance if the speech had been the equivalent of dancing the tango on Strictly Come Dancing!

"On delivery - I'd have given 3 out of 10. On factual accuracy, I'd have given him zilch!"

Wise old cat is Arturo! With 'Boy David' and wife away, we decided to forgo a 'kitchen supper'. I'll treat him to a fish-pie at the corner cafe tonight!

'Bye'