There's no 'bot' like an 'old' bot @ No 10

Arturo was full of seasonal cheer. He'd gobbled up the leftovers from the New Year's Eve lunch and had a swig at the punchbowl. Now, he was ready for a joke.

"I say! I say! I say! When is a bet, not a bet?"

"When is a bet not a bet?" I asked with a sinking feeling, knowing the answer would be long and complex.

"A bet is not a bet when it's a bot-bet!!" Arturo nearly fell over laughing. "Get it?"

I did not 'get it'. So I shook my head.

"Don't you never read them newspapers, what's all over the place?" He shoved several towards me. Then pointed to a laptop screen. "Take a butchers at some of them sites, mi old pal."

Between you and me - I don't understand betting! Odds are a mystery to me! What's more, I'm not sure I know what a 'bot' is either!

It seems there is an online betting site called 'Betfair'. I looked up Wikipedia to discover this about it:

A betting exchange allows punters (gamblers) to bet at odds set and requested by other punters rather than by a bookmaker. Members can make both 'back' bets (normal bets on a selection to win) and 'lay' bets (bets on the opposite side of the Back, against the selection), thereby eliminating the traditional bookmaker...

... The Betfair interface can be seen as bearing a strong similarity to that of the stock exchange, with the 'back' and 'lay' options comparing to the buying and selling of derivatives. Indeed there are many professionals who play the Betfair market for profit, using purpose-designed software 'robots', in much the same way as a stock market trader.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Betfair

Umm! So, maybe Georgy Osborne should try his hand at this! If it's only a procedure of 'back' and 'lay', it should be a doddle, shouldn't it? Whoa there! It's not that simple, it seems. If it was then there would be nothing to stop the Italians, the Spanish, the Irish 'backing' and 'laying' their options and getting rid of all that nasty 'leverage'! So what's the deal, I asked myself. How come Arturo said, 'when is a bet not a bet?' and answered 'when it's a bot bet.'

I turned to the irishtimes.com web site. There was an article about the whole strange story.

BETFAIR HAVE confirmed a technical fault with a “bot” was to blame for the remarkable betting patterns that took place during Wednesday’s woodiesdiy.com Christmas Hurdle at the Leopardstown Christmas Festival meeting.

The betting exchange eventually voided all in-running bets on the race after one customer, whoBetfair have also confirmed was UK-based, laid easy winner Voler La Vedette for £21,474,836 at 29 (28 to 1).

This would have left the customer with a maximum liability of close to £600 million.

Thank goodness the 'customer' was not Georgy Osborne, otherwise 'Bagpuss' Pickles would have had to raise Council Taxes!

So what did this Betfair lot have to say for themselves? They were not happy bunnies, I can tell you! Their CEO was quoted on the Irish Times web site as saying:

This bet was placed by one of our UK customers trading the race via our API or Application Programming Interface (http://bdp.betfair.com/) using an automated program (a ”bot“).

Their bot had developed a fault causing it to try and place a very large number of bets on the Exchange.

These bets were large in size and mispriced. As you know, the Betfair system is designed to prevent customers betting unless they have the funds to cover their maximum liability.

In this case, the customer had less than £1,000 in their account so none of these bets should have been accepted.

However, due to a technical glitch within the core exchange database, one of the bets evaded the prevention system and was shown on the site.

This was an issue that was triggered because of a unique sequence of events that had never happened before.

The race continued and Voler La Vedette won. £822,614 of backers’ stakes were matched of the customer’s bet, resulting in a potential liability to the customer of £23 million.

http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/sport/2011/1231/1224309675181.html

All sounds very dodgy to me! Almost as dodgy as the Euro and the bankers. A 'bot' that goes berserk is a worrying spectre!

I visited some sites offering bespoke 'betting bots'. These bots, I was told, will make money for me when I sleep; when I am at work catching vermin; when I am out indulging myself. I would not have to do anything other than watch my 'cashflow' grow! Or so the botmakers tell me in flowery terms. Great PR, boys!! By now, I reckon, if I got my own 'betting bot' - I'd either be a billionaire or homeless. Odds are - I'd be homeless!

So, on this last day of 2011, what does this story tell me? Like much that has happened in the world of money since about 2007, there are some very dicey things and people out there ready to fleece the unwary. They'll sell you a mortgage you can't afford. They'll sell enough 'debt' to bankrupt countries. They'll offer you deals which will just profit their wallets not yours. They'll make you a bot that will give you nightmares not joy.

Arturo and I have hidden the sites and papers about this betting bot scam! You see Georgy Osborne and 'Boy David' Cameron are so obsessed with debt and 'leverage' that they might get funny ideas as to how they could solve their problems. Though they're both PR men, PR men fall for stories like anyone else!

So Arturo and I wish everyone a Happy 2012 which is bot-free and leverage-free.

'Bye' from us both.