BIG bazookas @ No 10

"We'd better call up Wellington and Nelson!" Arturo said gleefully. "Looks like we'll need those Martello Towers again!"

It seems that 'Boy David' Cameron's little stomp in Brussels, last week caused 'big bazookas' against 'le Royaume Uni' to be fired from La Belle France. The bazooka shots are particularly violent from paranoid Sarkozy and from Christian Noyer, Governor of the Bank of France. Mr Sarkozy is even reported to have called Cameron 'an obstinate kid'. One wonders what he calls him in private!

As anyone who has even the vaguest knowledge of European history knows, France is the 'Old Enemy'. Not for nothing are they known as the 'froggies'. Our 'old' ally was Prussia. In fact, it was Prussian general, Gebhard von Blücher, who really won Waterloo for us! (Don't tell, Cameron!!).

The French breathed a consolidated sigh of relief when they no longer alighted from Eurostar at Waterloo. But - oh boy - didn't the Brits enjoy the discomfort until then!!

Of course, to the Froggies, the British have always been La Perfide Albion 'Perfidious Albion' or as Dr. Richard B. Spence would say:

Perfidious Albion – “Treacherous England,” “Faithless England,” or, if you prefer, “Dirty, Low-down, Sneaky England” – is commonly assumed to derive from the French La Perfide Albion. The epithet’s best known appearance is in the 1793 poem “L’ere de Francais” by the Marquis de Ximenez.

http://www.newdawnmagazine.com/articles/perfidious-albion-an-introduction-to-the-secret-history-of-the-british-empire

Ah! That was long ago and far away! But Sarkozy and Noyer feel the supposed perfidy intensely today.

Sarkozy is livid with Cameron. First, Cameron supposedly tried to destroy the unity of Europe in its valiant attempts to stave off disaster. Secretly - hush! hush! - we heard that really Sarkozy was only too keen for the Brits to be ousted! Indeed, some whisper that Cameron fell into a dastardly French trap!!

But now, it seems, our 'Boy David' has been wooing other slight wobblers in the EU. In other words, those who agreed to the enticements of Merkozy but who didn't really know to what they were agreeing!! Interesting phenomenon that! So typical of the Europeans, don't you agree?!!

Who are these wobblers? Well, The Guardian reported:

Over the past few days, Cameron has spoken to his counterparts in non-euro states Denmark, Sweden and the Czech Republic, all of whom are said to have concerns about the compact, as well as with Enda Kenny of eurozone member Ireland, who has warned he may have to put it to a referendum.

It went on:

Cameron's spokesman rejected reports that the PM was agitating against the agreement. "He has been speaking to a number of different European leaders in recent days and will continue to do so in the coming days, with the objective in mind of making clear that we want to engage constructively," said the spokesman.

"There is an inter-governmental agreement and a discussion about how to implement that inter-governmental agreement and we are seeking to engage constructively in that discussion.

"You would expect him to speak to a number of different European leaders in the coming days."

Innocent chit-chat? Depends on where you are sitting! Sarkozy prides himself on being the diplomat's diplomat. He longs for the French language to be the 'Lingua Franca' of all European diplomacy, is highly suspicious.

However, it is Christian Noyer who is, excuse the phrase, the eminence grise in this anti-Brit campaign. According to the same article in The Guardian:

Tensions between London and Paris were heightened further on Thursday after the head of France's central bank suggested that the UK was a candidate for a credit rating downgrade.

France is bracing itself for the potential loss of its coveted AAA rating after two credit agencies last week indicated they were considering marking down countries in the eurozone.

But Bank of France governor Christian Noyer said they should instead be looking at the UK because of the scale of debt and inflation and the poor levels of growth and bank lending on this side of the Channel.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2011/dec/15/france-eurozone-row-uk-credit-downgrade

In Le Télégramme, Dapper Mr Noyer is quoted as saying of Standard and Poor's consideration of downgrading certain European AAA ratings:

Ou alors, il faudrait qu'elles commencent par dégrader le Royaume Uni qui a plus de déficits, autant de dettes, plus d'inflation, moins de croissance que nous et dont le crédit s'effondre.

http://www.letelegramme.com/ig/generales/france-monde/france/christian-noyer-l-accord-de-bruxelles-est-bon-15-12-2011-1534967.php?xtmc=Noyer&xtcr=1

To put it into English:

Then perhaps, they should start by degrading the United Kingdom's standing. They have more deficits, are as much in debt, have more inflation and less growth than we have and their credit is collapsing

However, Noyer is deeply anxious that France's rating should not be downgraded.

So there you have it! 'Il vous l'avez!' 'Boy David' Cameron has finished his House of Commons fisty-cuffs with Ed Miliband. Now he is doing a re-run of the Napoleonic War! Next year isn't 1812 - it's 2012! Where are you Tchaikovsky!

'Bye'