Shapps eats his words @ No 10

Arturo was chuckling as he read Twitter. I peered over his shoulder and saw:

DodgeyDog: Shapps doesn't know what he's eating! Osborne can't add up, Cameron can't make up his mind, Clegg can't think straight - Omnishambles!

www.twitter.com

I was surprised to see him reading a dog's tweet and a 'dodgy' one at that. But then, Arturo is eclectic in his reading habits! He looked at me and asked if I'd read the Telegraph article on 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps?

I hadn't! But I soon found it. The article was written by Rosa Silverman under the headline:

Grant Shapps gives confused explanation of which animals we eat The Conservative Party chairman Grant Shapps was laughed at on national television after appearing to suggest that horses were carnivores.

As you must know there's been a furore over the contents of beefburgers! It seems beefburgers are not what they seem - at first sight! Or maybe one should say 'first bite'!

The problems for our 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps arose during BBC One’s Question Time. The question about the possibility of eating horse meat as a cheaper option than beef was raised. 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps always eager to answer any question, any time - rushed in with his thoughts. Like the proverbial cow - he ruminated. Whereas the cow just belches in some faraway field - our 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps uttered his thoughts as to:

“why we think some animals are socially acceptable to eat and others are not.”

Not an unreasonable thought, you might say! Most British people would have shuddered at the prospect of eating Desert Orchid or Red Rum though they happily munch on small calves and tiny lambs' livers. There's nought as queer as folk!

So - so far - so good for old Shapps! But then he allowed his uncensored ruminations to overwhelm him. He said:

“I think the answer is we basically eat animals that don’t eat animals. So we eat animals that eat grass and what have you.”

Ummm! Just think about it for a moment! And that, unfortunately for 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps is what some of his fellow panellists did. According to Rosa Silverman:

It was instantly pointed out to him, however, that horses eat grass. But under his theory as we don't eat horses, they would therefore be lumped with carnivores.

Faced with the undeniable facts of nature, Mr Shapps instantly abandoned his theory, replying good-humouredly: “That’s not the answer! I thought I had cracked it.”

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/conservative/9810181/Grant-Shapps-gives-confused-explanation-of-which-animals-we-eat.html

You have to admit that it was the 'good-humoured' part of his explanation that saved his bacon! Ha Ha!

The worry that both Arturo and I have is that this bloke, Shapps, is in the Coalition Government and a Member of Parliament for Welwyn Hatfield. In addition, he is Chairman of the Conservative Party & Minister without Portfolio.

Here we have a man who ruminates out loud the possibility that a horse eats more than just grass and hay i.e is possibly a carnivore. This is the man who aims to get the Conservative Party into Government after the next election. And this time the aim is not coalition - no siree - it's sole Conservative Party government. All I can say is with a Chairman like this who mistakes his horses for his carnivores - Heaven help the Conservative Party!!

As for me and mi old carnivore pal, Arturo, we're going mousing tonight!

Bye