They're all 'at it' @ N0 10

Yesterday morning, I did not have to wait for snippets of news from Arturo. I saw it big and bold - before my very eyes! Let me tell you how it happened.

A young Intern was giggling and reading out a headline, from The Daily Telegraph, to one of the secretaries. He said:
"Just listen to this! 'Hands Off Our Land: top civil servant lands planning job' It goes on to say: 'A senior civil servant at the heart of controversial planning reforms has been accused of cashing in on his position by accepting a lucrative job in the property industry.' "

Well, I thought - what's wrong with that? All the politicians do it, don't they? Did you see that Peter Oborne TV programme about Blair?

Now Blair cashed in' alright! Done very nicely, thank you! So no doubt the civil servants thought it was their turn now.

The Intern chattered away inconsequentially to the secretary, till they both grew tired of the subject. Then they went off to 'get a coffee'. I sneaked
over and read the article. It was written by Christopher Hope and James Kirkup.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/hands-off-our-land/8795758/Hands-Off-Our-Land-top-civil-servant-lands-planning-job.html

The article reveals that the civil servant in question is one Richard McCarthy, a director-general at the Department for Communities and Local Government. So, I thought to myself - yet more trouble for the triumvirate of Foolish Monkeys Shapps, Clark and Pickles. They just seem to welcome bad headlines, don't they? Anyway - it seems that this McCarthy chap is going to join Capita Symonds. If you look up details about Capita Symonds, you'll discover that they advise major developers on planning and construction.

Yes! That's right! You did read that correctly! This McCarthy, who has been working for old 'Bagpuss' Pickles and 'Disgusting' Clark in drawing up the Draft National Planning Policy Framework (NPPF), is now going to work for a company that could well benefit from that same new planning framework!

According to the article, John Mann, a Labour MP was, to put it mildly, perturbed by this state of affairs! He said that Mr McCarthy’s move was “wholly unacceptable”.

Was this Mr McCarthy perturbed by Mr Mann's concerns? The answer - short and simple - is 'No'! In fact, he seems quite delighted at having been 'head-hunted' earlier in the year.

The Daily Telegraph article comments:

In a statement issued by his new firm, Mr McCarthy, whose current job title is Director-general of Neighbourhoods, said: “I am looking forward to driving the business forward in this sector and further cementing Capita Symonds’ status as a leader in delivering a wealth of property and infrastructure solutions.”

Sir Bob Kerslake, the permanent secretary at the local government department said Mr McCarthy had “made a huge contribution to the work of the department over a long period, and has led on the introduction of major changes in housing, planning and regeneration.”

'Regeneration' - now there's a word that has a ring. Wasn't it 'casinos' that were being pushed by the previous government as one of the regenerative forces to solve economic woes in deprived areas?

In a subsequent interview with Building magazine, Mr McCarthy said:

“There is absolutely no connection between this and the timing of planning reform. When an opportunity comes you can’t wait for everything to finish before moving on.”

So there it is, in a nutshell, as the old Latin tag says 'Carpe diem!' - Seize the day! This McCarthy certainly 'carped' on the 'diem'! Many in Whitehall will say 'Jolly good luck to you, McCarthy, old chap!'

There are others though who will shake their heads at the moral turpitude that seems to have descended onto the heads of those working in Westminster! First - it was the scheming MPs who scrabbled in the dirt for every last penny they could pick up. Now - our civil servants are rushing headlong into the arms of commercial companies that they should avoid like the plague, if they wish to
maintain their integrity!

Meanwhile - soldiers, sailors and airmen who have been in the heat of battle are being told they are surplus to requirements!

It's a funny old world you humans inhabit. I'm just glad I'm a cat!

'Bye'

The 'papers' united will not be defeated @ No 10

"It takes either a fool, a crook or a great man to unite The Guardian and The Daily Telegraph in an opinion." Arturo said sagely.

"So who are you talking about?" I asked, knowing that he was just dying to tell me.

"Three guesses?"

"Old Fox Lansley."

"Good try - but guess again."

"'Apple Schnapps' Shapps."

"Try again."

"Well - the Three Foolish Monkeys: 'Apple Schnapps', 'Bagpuss' Pickles and 'Mr Disgusted' Clark."

"Yep! But this time only two of the Foolish Monkeys get a bashing- the stooge - 'Mr Disgusted' Clark - our brilliant (I don't think) planning minister. And, of course, our pal Eric 'Bagpuss' Pickles. Between the two - they united them! Here," Arturo placed several cuttings in front of me, "take a gander - then write your blog." So saying, he yawned and walked away.

I looked at the cuttings. One was written in The Daily Telegraph on September 27 by Bill Cash, MP for Stone in Staffordshire. The article's title was 'Hands Off Our Land: Why do MPs remain silent over planning reforms?'. It cites the new planning reforms as being a veritable disaster for the country. He writes that:

"The planning framework was not even available for inspection until after the localism Bill had passed the House of Commons – Sir Humphrey would be proud, but many MPs feel justifiably aggrieved."

He goes on to comment:

"The Government insists that local communities will be able to protect themselves by adopting neighbourhood plans. Yet under the Localism Bill, these would have to operate within the constraints of a legal presumption in favour of development. A plan will only be accepted when it complies with the National Planning Policy Framework (NPPF), and with the local authority’s own plan (which must follow national guidance), and with our EU obligations, especially in terms of promoting renewable energy."

Bill Cash makes a passionate argument for MPs to be given time to scrutinise the new planning framework. He ends by stating:

"The Government must give councils breathing space to put new plans in place to avoid planning by appeal and a default “yes” to development. It must also table amendments in the Report stage, before the Localism Bill returns to the Commons for a final vote. The crunch is now, but it is still not too late."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/hands-off-our-land/8791981/Hands-Off-Our-Land-Why-do-MPs-remain-silent-over-planning-reforms.html

So - I wondered what the other two cuttings held that could, in Arturo's words, unite The Daily Telegraph and The Guardian. The first was 'Our planning system is authorised blackmail – and it's about to get worse' by George Monbiot. It was in The Guardian on 26 September. There was a large photo of 'Mr Disgusted' Clark staring like a creature out of Orwell's '1984'. Monbiot begins the article like this:

"Every government needs an Eric Pickles: a human wrecking ball who will swing wherever he's told. Every
government needs a man or woman of crashing insensitivity, devoid of empathy or imagination, unaware of the value of what he or she has been instructed to demolish."

I cheered! Two of our Three Foolish Monkeys demolished
1. The demonic photo of 'Disgusting' Clark (I've decided the new moniker suits him better!!!)
2. The image of 'Bagpuss' PIckles as a 'human wrecking ball'. Of course, he does have the build for it! Know wha' I mean?

The article destroys the credibility of 'Bagpuss' Pickles as having any desire other than to construct a developers' charter. Monbiot gives examples from his own experience and cites other cases where large developers have ridden roughshod over the wishes of small local communities. The developers have the time, the patience, the incentives and - most important of all - the money to get what they want. George Monbiot ends his article in this way:

"The Wullies – build Whatever You Like, Wherever You Like – have their hand in the glove of government. They have portrayed this as a fight between green and brown, town and country, growth and stagnation. It's simpler than that. It's a fight between corporate power and democracy."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/sep/26/planning-system-authorised-blackmail

The third cutting was also from The Guardian on 28 Septemeber. It was written by Caroline Lucas, leader of the Green Party, under the title 'Planning reforms are bigger threat to our countryside than forest sell-off'. Her passion is evident. She writes:

"The proposed new planning framework now out to consultation is, if anything, a worse threat to our countryside, because "economic development" (read "developers' profits") will override environmental protection not just for our woods but for every field, hedgerow, marsh, heath and moor in England. These plans will also help accelerate the decline of inner cities and high streets by encouraging more urban sprawl. And they are a further attack on local democracy."

She makes three points indicating reasons for opposing the new planning framework:
1. It ignores the fact that undeveloped land is a finite resource
2. It has a presumption in favour of developers which is even stronger than under the current system
3 It makes development on greenfield sites easier and it will have a knock-on effect for inner cities. This will be made worse because the national target for redeveloping brownfield sites is to go.

She advocates that instead of pushing ahead with the new framework, "the government should introduce a Land Value Tax (or LVT) – a levy on the unimproved value of land." This would "encourage them to develop vacant and under-used land properly".
http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2011/sep/28/planning-reforms-threat-to-countryside

So - Arturo was right! In a just cause - good people see through the spin to the crux of the matter and forget their usual prejudices. I say 'Hurrah for the united front presented by The Daily Telegraph and The Guardian in their endeavours to save the countryside and green spaces from the greedy claws of developers.

'Bye' from me.

Georgy and the 'lame duck' @ No 10

Arturo came thundering into the kitchen: "Watch it! Georgy is rushing through the inter-connecting doors between here and No 11! He's in a right old state!"

I licked my paws - I still had cream on them, before replying: "What's wrong with him now?"

"What's not wrong - is more like it!"

We both followed the sounds of squeaking shoes heading fast down the corridor leading to the Terracotta Room. I caught sight of the ghastly 'More Passion' artwork as it flickered on the wall. Then, I saw the back of Georgy's head. His black curls were disheveled and when he turned round I saw that he was red in the face.

"See what I mean?" Arturo whispered.

"I've got enough on my plate running the Treasury, balancing the books, bringing down the deficit, advising the IMF, speaking to Angela Merkel - and ensuring that we get re-elected in 2015 now! Now, I have others in the Cabinet undermining my financial plans!" Georgy Osborne did indeed sound rattled. Usually his excellent Etonian training has helped him maintain the suave outer persona. Now - here he was talking to himself in loud whispers!

I was curious - whatever could have caused him to act so out of the character he has striven to present to the outside world. I left Arturo listening to the rant. I went off to investigate.

It wasn't long before I discovered part of the reason. I owed the discovery to James Kirkup, political editor of The Daily Telegraph. He wrote an article today entitled: 'George Osborne is warned of disaster over welfare reforms'. It seems that some

senior Whitehall officials and industry experts

have been investigating the claims made by those hoping to implement the Universal Credit.

Now - you will recall in my post on 14 September 2011: There's many a slip twixt ... @ No 10 , I described the high aims of the 'Silent Man' Iain Duncan Smith to reform the welfare payments. The new Universal Credit IT system would be tested by April 2013. It would then come into play in September 2013.

This short timetable was crucial to Georgy's hopes for the Coalition's success at the next election! If it worked - the great British people would applaud him for helping to bring down the deficit 'at a stroke'. This would ensure votes! And what, my friends, do votes mean? Why - they mean POWER! And we all know that POWER is what Georgy and 'Boy David' Cameron want. Otherwise - how can they continue in government? There's no fun being in Opposition! You miss out on the perks of power - jolly old hols and all that! Great lodgings in Downing Street! Lovely country estates - all at no personal expense.

So - who in their right mind wouldn't want to continue in POWER!

Now - along comes this Silent Man Iain Duncan Smith - he promised great things - his reforms would produce:

'a simpler benefits system' that 'will help cut down on the £5 billion a year wrongly paid out through fraud and error'.

If this plan succeeded - what a boost to the hopes for the next election. There's nothing the public like more than seeing fraudsters put in their place.

The snag, however, is the IT strategy. Firstly the majority of benefit claimants do not process their claims online - a pre-requisite for the 'Universal Credit' to work! Secondly, the failure rate of new IT programs is well documented! Many don't work at all! Others manage to lose data in abundance! Those that do work come in months - or even years - late!!

Horror of horrors for Georgy Osborne! The Universal Credit may not live up to its name. It may be neither 'universal' nor will it bring 'credit'! In fact - it may turn out to be a 'lame duck'!

According to James Kirkup's article:

The fears within Whitehall echo alarm already expressed by independent observers. The National Audit Office has warned that the welfare reform programme faces major risks. The chairman of the Commons public accounts committee has called the plan “a train crash waiting to happen”.

(http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/labour/8788299/George-Osborne-is-warned-of-disaster-over-welfare-reforms.html)

So - now I understood why Georgy Osborne was standing in the Terracotta Room beneath 'More Passion' and tearing his hair out!

Come to think of it - Arturo and I wouldn't mind a 'lame duck' or two running round Downing Street!

'Bye'

From Arturo

From Me

Another pitfall? @ No 10

Arturo found my rather battered copy of The Daily Telegraph from 15 September. He glanced at it and nodded sagely.

"It seems the government has a propensity for biting its own arse!" he said.

I was shocked - by his rather crude manner of speech and also by his ability to see the truth when others don't. I knew I was going to be told another gem of information - and I was right.

"I don't know who oversees the government's policies," Arturo commented, "But whoever it is doesn't make sure there are no pitfalls before going ahead with them."

"For instance?" I asked.

"For instance the new cuts to legal aid - just take a look at yesterday's Guardian - it'll make your whiskers curl!" So saying he dropped the paper in front of me. "Take a gander at the article by Randeep Ramesh, the Guardian's social affairs editor: Conservative MP piloting legal aid cuts may profit from the changes- then read his other article Tory party donations by insurance firms in marked increase since 2005." So saying he sauntered off towards the kitchen. I wondered whether he was trying to divert my attention from food! However, I could not resist reading what this Randeep Ramesh had discovered.

And was this another pitfall? Well - I'll let you judge for yourself. My posts about the government's policies on forests, benefits, housing, planning, localism, education, pensions and the NHS have shown that every time a minister opens his mouth - he shoves a bloomin' great foot in it - I'll try to let the facts speak for themselves, this time. I say try!!

Randeep Ramesh writes:

According to an investigation by the Guardian, financial firms with insurance interests have given the Tories £5.4m in the last decade, £4.9m of that since David Cameron became leader in December 2005.

(http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2011/sep/16/conservative-party-donations-insurance-companies)

That's not a paltry sum! Not bad! Not bad, at all! Almost as good as the £3.3 million given to them by the property developers over the last three years!

Now, we know that the property developers are delighted with the new planning proposals - you could argue - I say could - that it was a very happy investment for them!

So what, I wondered had Randeep Ramesh and the Guardian unearthed, this time. I was amazed!

It seems that

controversial plans to cut legal aid and curb payouts ... could benefit the insurance industry to the tune of a billion pounds

(http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2011/sep/16/conservative-mp-legal-aid-cuts)

Ah Ha! It's money again, isn't it? Wise old bloke the one who said 'The love of money is the root of all evil' - He wasn't kidding, was he?

There is a man with a very strange name that even Arturo cannot get his tongue round - one Jonathan Djanogly - I'll call him 'Ugly Ogly' - I can say that! Well - to get to the point - 'Ugly Ogly' Djanogly is the legal services minister in this government. He is in charge of the new legal aid 'reforms'!

We know the government is intent on savings. Give them a big hand for that! Savings is the flavour of the month - but where there are government savings, there are usually winners and there are losers! So! Who will benefit from the reforms?

This bill that 'Ugly Ogly' Djanogly, is taking through parliament will try to cut the budget for legal aid by £350m. It will also force claimants to pay their lawyers' success fees and also the insurance policies that cover court costs out of any damages they might be awarded.

Randeep Ramesh commented:

Experts say this will benefit the insurance industry by at least "hundreds of millions of pounds".

So there you have it! It's the insurance industry that will be the winner if this bill and its 'reforms' gets through parliament!

Oh Boy! There's another stink around here and this time I know it ain't my sardines - cos Arturo just ate them!

I've had enough of this 'pitfall' for one day! However, I guess it means there'll have to be another 'about turn' when 'Boy David' Cameron realises the folly of allowing this to happen.

Being the excellent PR man, he is reputed to be - he surely won't want another scandal to slip in alongside the others!! If he fails to take action on this and on the seeming payback for the property developers, his reputation will plummet - now that would spell real trouble!

'Bye'

The twitter from the birds is lost @ No 10

I came back from a trot around the rose garden to see a copy of The Daily Telegraph lying on the floor. It seemed to have been scrunched up and - I swear - there were teeth marks on one of the pages.

Curious, I pried open the page which had suffered the greatest mutilation. It was an article called:

Hands off our land: This isn't the planning policy that I drew up

I had noticed some junior staff from the office of the planning minister - 'Mr Disgusted' Greg Clark - looking grim, as they walked down the corridor. Now, I knew why!

The coterie of ministers who gathered around 'Bagpuss' Pickles had been feeling very pleased with themselves. Localism was the IN word! Localism seemed the word to assure everyone that Local Opinion rules Okay! It wouldn't frighten the horses.

So - little by little - and subtle to a high degree - the National Planning Policy Framework (NPPF) was drawn up. Of course, there had to be an assurance to the wider world that the group who had advised Greg Clark on the new policy had impeccable environmental credentials! Who better to invite then, than a representative from the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds (RSPB). This has two major attractions :
(1) It has the word 'Royal' a great imprimatur, you will admit.
(2) It has the word 'Birds' and everyone loves the little tweety things, don't they?

So - 'Mr Disgusted' Clark felt he had achieved a great coup here. If the man from the RSPB said it was 'Okay' - then okay it surely was.

The trouble came later - the man selected to represent the RSPB was Simon Marsh, acting head of sustainable development at the RSPB. He had attended the meetings with three other experts who made up the panel to help draw up the new planning policy. They argued, they debated, they drafted documents. They came up with - what Mr Marsh described as :

a succinct, but flawed document

In yesterday's 'Daily Telegraph', Simon Marsh wrote the rather despairing article that I had seen scrunched up on the floor: Hands off our land: This isn't the planning policy that I drew up. In this, he says that the new policy is now balanced too much in favour of development. He is concerned that there are those in government “who don’t place a high value on the environment”.

He goes on to say:

But the big argument isn’t really over the environmental policies. It’s over the “presumption in favour of sustainable development” and the overall tone of the document, which puts the economy first. This marks a profound shift in emphasis for planning policy.

This was arrived at - after the 'flawed document' was amended and re-drafted by

other departments across government, including those who don’t place a high value on either the environment or the planning system.

To be fair - Mr Marsh writes that there are some welcome points in the new document - but overall - he considers the impact on the environment is a secondary consideration as against the 'the presumption in favour of sustainable development'.

(http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/hands-off-our-land/8765316/Hands-off-our-land-This-isnt-the-planning-policy-that-I-drew-up.html

As I poured over the paper, I thought how unfortunate it was that Simon Marsh's time, energy and intelligence had been so misrepresented. But then, as with so many other areas of policy - once money enters into the argument - goodwill goes out the window!

As a truly disillusioned cat, I curled up on the paper and dozed!

'Bye'

There's many a slip twixt ... @ No 10

"Hey, Butch mi old mate, did you hear about Boy David's trip to Russia?" Arturo asked, in very jovial tones.

"Of course! I heard him rehearsing his speech. He said something I couldn't understand - then he giggled!"

"Ah! That was him practising his Russian phrase! His aides thought it would go down well! Did you hear his story?"

"You mean about the KGB trying to recruit him when he was on a 1985 gap year visit to the Black Sea?"

Arturo looked disappointed that I knew - He loves telling me news!

"He and they had a lucky escape then!" He joked. "His PR skills would have left them stunned and reeling!"

Arturo padded off back to Number 11 where they have troubles of their own!

There are so many troubles looming over 'Boy David' at the moment that I expect he wished he'd accepted the putative invitation - so many years ago!

What troubles are these, do you ask? Well - let me list just a few:

** The new Universal Credit the love child of the 'Silent Man' Iain Duncan Smith . Our IDS jumped onto the 'reform' bandwagan with alacrity! Others would say with foolhardy eagerness. He thought that - with just a click of his fingers - he could break down the complex benefit system and produce this so-called 'universal' credit! He obviously had not heard the saying 'There's many a slip twixt cup and lip'! Or, of course, he may have decided to ignore it.

Whatever the reason - there's trouble brewing, according to several MPs. It seems that MPs on the Public Accounts Committee have warned that

The successful transition to Universal Credit will depend heavily on the development of a new IT system with HM Revenue and Customs to a very tight timetable. We have often seen problems with delivering new IT to time, budget and specification.

The Government wanted to commence testing the new Universal Credit IT system by April 2013. It would then come into play in September 2013.

Members of the Public Accounts Committee commented:

Failure to meet this timetable could increase costs and have a knock-on effect on other budgets and cost reduction plans.

Of course, IDS, being a prudent man, was hoping that his new credit system would bring in massive savings for the government. Savings being the key word of the day! Never mind the service - get the savings! Perhaps this should be the new motto for our 'Silent Man' Iain Duncan Smith.

It seems the Department for Work and Pensions had high hopes that savings would be made by encouraging people to use the internet for obtaining their claims! The goal was that 80 per cent of Jobcentre Plus customers would do this. How many do so, at present? - 17%! Any delay in getting the new IT system up and running might hamper their stated aim of achieving the £2.7billion savings by March 2015. So - if they are to succeed they'd better strive hard to get the other 63% tapping on their keyboards in the next 4 years!

So IDS will be biting his fingernails to the quick, in anticipation of the complex IT system operating smoothly and people turning to online systems to obtain their Universal Credit! Some hope!

Another problem for No 10 is:
** The new planning policy. As regular readers of this blog will know - the planning policy changes have raised a furore throughout England's 'green and pleasant land'. Yet - the Coalition was desperately hoping that it would help 'kick-start' economic growth. Georgy Osborne - who has his mind on other troubles at the moment - thought that the growth would come from brick-layers, glaziers, concrete manufacturers, plumbers, electricians - you get the picture? - all working their little socks off - all over the place. Woods would be felled! Fields would be flattened! Buildings would rise - just like Topsy - and Hey presto! the lovely dosh would roll into the Treasury. Georgy would take the credit and get a round of applause!

But - and it's now a big but - it seems the property developers have been lashing out the lolly to the Tory Party. Something smells here - and it ain't my sardines! This planning policy has raised the hackles of not only the National Trust and the Campaign for the Preservation of Rural England (CPRE) but also of many right thinking citizens.

The claim for the new planning policy maybe 'localism' but there's localism and then there's localism! Once again - in foolish haste to get their hands on the money - the policy has been ill-thought out!

Yet a third anxiety is:
** The Health and Social Care Bill - need I say more? All that needs to be said here is 'Save the NHS'. It looks, however, as if the Lords, resplendent in their cloaks, will scupper 'Old Fox' Lansley's much heralded NHS plans - so yet another worry for No 10!

By the way, I've just noticed in The Daily Telegraph on 12 September Robert Winnett, Deputy Political Editor in Moscow reported that President Medvedev said:

David would have been a very good KGB agent, but in this case he would never have become a Prime Minister of the UK.

When I saw that, I got to thinking that maybe - just maybe - it would have been a good thing if 'Boy David' Cameron had been recruited, after all!

I'm off to get my sardines!

'Bye'

' Top down, bottom up or around the back' @ No 10

Once again, Arturo has proved invaluable in spotting a good story in the papers. He has the speedy reactions of a wily alley cat and nothing gets passed him. He showed me the comments made by John Healey today.

John Healey, shadow health secretary did not have a brilliant week last week. Despite valiant efforts from him, Owen Smith and Liz Kendall the Health and Social Care Bill was passed in the House of Commons. This has not, however, dampened Mr Healey's aptitude for using a pithy phrase when it is needed. Thus, it was that on hearing of the closure of vital services in an Enfield hospital he came up with the following statement:

This is a big humiliation for David Cameron and Andrew Lansley. Whether they try to spin it as top down, bottom up or around the back, voters will see this as yet another broken NHS promise from the Tories.

And the phrase 'top down, bottom up or around the back' is so apt for what's been going on with the whole Tory Party recently. They have been so besotted by spin that they have made themselves dizzy. They issue a statement saying one thing; two minutes later they say the complete opposite. Other times, they put on their best bib and tucker, complete with the obligatory blue tie, and declare something to be the fact and nothing but the fact. A day later, a leaked email - a whistleblower - or a vigilant journalist - will reveal that the fact was no more a fact than I am a human-being! Let me give you some examples:

In the context of the NHS and the hospital to which Mr Healey was referring - 'Boy David' Cameron and 'Old Fox' Lansley had shed tears of oozing sincerity when they visited this Enfield hospital in 2007. At that time, there were doubts about the future of the hospital. Eager to curry favour, and being a superb PR man, Boy David Cameron said:

What I would say to Gordon Brown is if you call an election on 1 November we'll stop the closure of services at this hospital on 2 November.

What a man! What a statement! All Enfield residents must have been thrilled when a Tory-led Coalition came to power! The PM would be as good as his 9 words,(we'll stop the closure of services at this hospital). He would, wouldn't he? Well NO, actually, he would not! Today that same hospital has lost its A & E service and its maternity service!

Was that 'top down' or 'bottom up' or 'around the back' from Cameron, our PR of a PM? Knowing Boy David, as I do, seeing him most days - admittedly from under a chair or behind a curtain - I'd say it was 'around the back' with a 'wink wink' thrown in for good measure. Know wha' I mean'!

Another example of this double-talk spin is easy to find. Remember our three foolish monkeys: 'Bagpuss' Pickles, 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps and 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells' Clark? They have been so determined to push through the new planning policy that they forgot to ensure that the Tory Party's connections with property developers was well and truly hidden.

We know that these property developers have given the Tories some £3.3 million over the last three years! Nice! Very nice!

We have already been told that these same developers did not influence the drafting of the new planning policy that is so heavily slanted towards 'sustainable development'.

Today, in 'The Daily telegraph' it is revealed that Grant Clark, the planning minister who has always claimed that the new proposals are "driven by economic and social need, not lobbying by builders", has not been completely open about the goings-on around the policy.

'The Daily Telegraph' has published an email from Ghislaine Trehearne, the policy officer of the British Property Federation (BPF) which shows quite cleaarly that Grant 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells' Clark is delighted with the efforts of the property developers to counteract the adverse publicity being conjured up by his opponents. Indeed, they are 'delighted' that he is 'delighted'!

The upshot of all this is that minister Greg Clark is delighted with the BPF and hugely grateful for our effort. He is of the opinion that the Chancellor will stand firm in the face of opposition from National Trust members in the shires – but he doesn't believe we can afford to let up and should seize every opportunity to press the case for planning reform.

(http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/hands-off-our-land/8756477/Planning-ministers-in-pact-with-developers-over-reforms.html)

Now is this 'top down' or 'bottom up' or 'around the back'? I venture to suggest - knowing Mr 'Disgusted' - that this is a blatant 'bottom up'!

All Arturo and I can say is that if the people elect a government headed by those gifted with the silver-tongues of the public relations people that they once were - then it should be no surprise that they get spin - spin and more spin! Whether it is top down, bottom up or round the back - it's spin nothing more nor less!

So saying, I'm feeling dizzy - I'm going to have a lie down!

'Bye'

The 3 Foolish Monkeys @ No 10

"You just couldn't make it up - if you tried." That was Arturo's comment when he saw the headline in today's The Daily Telegraph.

When I asked him just what it was that he found so incredulous, he said:
"Let me read some of it to you - 'Conservatives given millions by property developers'. It goes on to say: 'The Conservative Party has received millions of pounds in donations from developers who stand to benefit from the Government’s controversial planning reforms, The Daily Telegraph can disclose.' The reporter doing the disclosing is Heidi Blake ." Arturo looked at me, waiting for a response. I just shook my head in disbelief!

And this, my friends, is The Daily Telegraph, we are talking about - not a left-leaning paper that would have a vested interest in digging the dirt about the Tories and the Coalition. So good on them!

However, the three foolish monkeys: 'Bagpuss' Pickles, 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps and 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells' Clark have kept very quiet about all this free-flowing money. I wonder why!

It seems that, according to Heidi Blake,

Dozens of property firms have given a total of £3.3 million to the party over the past three years, including large gifts from companies seeking to develop rural land.

Now - if we were in certain other countries - no names, no pack-drill - this would not come as a surprise. But in England! And the Tory Party - that boasts several Old Etonians at its head! Well, I ask you! The Eton College motto is 'Esto perpetua' which translated means 'May it last forever' - something that people hoped they could apply to the tranquility of their own landscape!

Of course, those who go to Eton, Harrow, Winchester et al - are likely to have large slices of the English countryside surrounding their own homes - slices that they would refuse to have touched. In fact, they would probably not allow a single blade of grass to be violated - let alone a slice of their land!

Remember 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells' Clark fought tooth and nail to protect "our precious green spaces" when a developer had cast his eyes on some prime development land in his constituency - this was before he became a minister! It's amazing how those 'precious' spaces, in other people's backyards, are regarded as ripe for 'sustainable development'.

Seven years ago, Eric 'Bagpuss' Pickles, the Communities Secretary, slammed Labour's efforts to liberalise the planning system. He dreaded seeing "sprawling housing estates dumped by Whitehall on green land". Yet now he is advocating the same thing - and worse - with real Pickles' gusto - and that's some gusto, I can tell you!

Old 'Apple schnapps' Shapps, our gallant housing minister, has also opposed plans for thousands of new houses in his Welwyn Hatfield constituency. Yet now he positively shivers with delight at the prospect of building 42,500 houses every year for the next four years.

Now - I have nothing against houses - got a cosy one here in Downing Street, haven't I? And young people need homes. What I think is wrong is plonking these 42,500 houses willy-nilly on land that local people want to see protected.

Richard Gray in The Daily Telegraph on 28 August wrote:

Figures compiled from the UK's leading house builders have revealed that they have enough land to build 617,724 homes. Less than half of this land has been granted any kind of planning permission.

It follows that these 'leading house builders' already have obtained planning permission for 300,000 houses. Where are they?

Richard Gray went on to write:

Under the Draft National Planning Policy Framework, the current planning rules will be changed so that applications will be treated with a "presumption for consent", meaning applications will be automatically granted if they meet certain criteria.

And that, my friends, is the issue! Houses need to be built for the young to bring up their families. But developers are not charities - far from it - they're in it for the dosh - pure and simple. They'll build where they can be assured of the greatest profit and blow the consequences!

These three abominable foolish monkeys - Pickles, Shapps and Clark - are not the only Tory big-wigs to be enthralled by the prospect of covering England's green and pleasant land with bricks and mortar.

A Tory MP - who did not wish to be named - told The Daily Telegraph reporters Christopher Hope, and Heidi Blake that these planning measures were a "state licence to print money" He went on to say:

"This is a clear example of localism being hijacked and turned into something else. That presumption completely sidelines local authorities, which flies in the face of what localism is all about, but then we know that George Osborne is not a localist."

So - now we have it! Our Georgy from No 11, the second most important person in government is also in it!

The really 'Big Boys' Pickles and Osborne would appear to see the planning reforms as some sort of macho posturing. You just need to see their joint article in The Financial Times on 4 September, http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/d14169b0-d598-11e0-9133-00144feab49a.html#ixzz1Xa1UxYux

At the end of this article they said:

No-one should underestimate our determination to win this battle.

The property developers who were hoping for more bangs for their bucks, surely, cannot believe their eyes!

Arturo has just fainted! Now there's a cat with impeccable principles!

'Bye'

'There may be trouble ahead' @ No 10

One week back and already there is dissension surrounding No 10. Those Libdems who have remained true to their principles look as though they may start rocking the Coalition boat. Arturo told me he noticed many more yellow ties coming in through the doors of Nos 10 and 11! He is, of course, something of a sartorial guru.

Now, however, there are more substantial problems heading the Coalition's way. Large grey clouds are forming on the horizon for 'Boy David' Cameron and his band of men. The trouble looming comes in the form of the Trades Union Congress (TUC). Brendan Barber, General Secretary of the TUC, is fighting for not only his members' rights but to force the Coalition to "put the brake on austerity". He wants a re-think of the plans which have hit the poorest families so hard.

Mr Barber does not mince his words. He thinks that the government needs to come up with "an economic alternative" and that it was beginning to "lose its central arguments on the economy". His worry is that the way things are going - there will be a double-dip recession.

Next week - the TUC will hold its major congress. In anticipation of this, it has released details of a report, it commissioned, into how the cuts will impact ordinary families:

a two-earner family with two children living in the East Midlands will experience a living standards gap of £2,000 this year, with that divide widening to £4,600 by 2013.

It seems that the figures were derived from combining the impact of inflation on wages, how changes to tax and benefits will hit income, and the value of services that will be removed by cuts.

Mr Barber told a press conference:

Trying to eliminate the deficit in just four years can now be seen as nothing more than a national programme of self-harm. It has killed both consumer and business confidence. With the cuts already putting the brake on government investment, the net result is that almost no one is investing. Yet without growth, there is no prospect of closing the deficit gap in the short, medium or long term. The desperate position that the government now finds itself in is shown by the sheer irrelevance of its ideas for growth. Scrapping the 50p tax rate as many Conservatives want, or tearing up a planning system that has not stopped growth when the economy was functioning well shows just how far away from the real economy and real people they are.

Arturo became very excited when he learned about all this: "It spells trouble for Georgy in No 11 - he'll just go plain potty when he hears about this. He thinks he's God's gift to economic revival!"

As usual, Sage Arturo - as I call him, is right - the sh** will hit the fan - when Georgy finally realises that not everyone thinks he's as brilliant as he thinks he is.

Mr Barber is not exactly threatening the government - you understand - he's just saying that the unions will build alliances with communities opposed to local cuts.

He said:

We will potentially have industrial battles that we will be fighting over this next period, but we have a battle of ideas – we've got an intellectual battle to win too.

He trusted that ministers would start to think

pretty carefully before they reach a position where we do have a much broader conflict, where I think they have a lot at risk.

Now - as you know - I'm no great political thinker or economist - I'm the under stairs cat. Along with my pal, Sage Arturo, we see it all at Nos 10 and 11 Downing Street. What we see is trouble brewing in the coming months. In fact, it caused Arturo to break into song - in his fine feline tenor:

.... Before the fiddlers have fled
Before they ask us to pay the bill
....Soon
We'll be without the moon
Humming a diff'rent tune
...There may be teardrops to shed
....

I just hope it ain't us who have to pay the bill or shed the teardrops!

'Ciao' from Arturo:

'Bye' from me

I cannot tell a lie ... @ No 10

Arturo and I managed to sneak in to view one of the younger intern's computer monitors. It was fixed on the Health and Social Care Bill debate - luckily for us. Arturo couldn't wait to get a glimpse of Boudicca aka Liz Kendall.

"There she is!" He squeaked, catching sight of her. Dressed in bright blue, she looked every bit the heroine of the day, once again.

This time, however, there was someone else to speak out against 'Old Fox' Lansley's Bill. It was a man with a similar South Wales accent to Aneurin Bevan, post-war architect of the National Health Service. One Owen Smith, Labour MP for Pontypridd, who spoke with precision and fluency about what was wrong with the Bill.

Arturo and I had high hopes that 'Wailing Lad' Clegg might stick to his principles and speak up against the Bill, as well. However, he seems to think he has done his bit by putting forward some minor amendments! Most of the rest of the LibDems - hoping to hang on to the Coalition for as long as possible - also lost their principles.

"They're going to get a real drubbing - whenever the next election comes." Arturo whispered sagely! "If there's one thing humans hate - it's people who say one thing to get into power - then do the opposite once they're there!"

The Bill had its Third Reading tonight - it will now go to the Lords. Arturo hopes that they will be more robust. However, very quietly, I told him what the Noble Lord, Earl Howe, Parliamentary Under Secretary of State (Quality), Health had to say about the Health and Social Care Bill when he addressed Laing & Buisson’s Independent Healthcare Forum :

Now, we in government are regularly accused of favouring the private sector. We don’t.

To be honest, I don’t think it should matter one jot whether a patient is looked after by a hospital or a medical professional from the public, private or charitable sector. What matters is the quality of care they receive, the outcomes they get and that it always remains free at the point of delivery.

... huge opportunities for high quality companies that can provide high quality care. ... In the coming months and years, the National Health Service is going to evolve and grow into a very different animal.

Now the Noble Lord, Earl Howe was a former banker - so he knows a great deal about healthcare! He does, however, know a great deal about the quest for profit. So when he says there will be :huge opportunities for high quality companies that can provide high quality care, I'm sure people attending the Independent Healthcare Forum were rubbing their hands together - in anticipation.

I cannot tell a lie, I think the NHS is doomed. Unless that is - any LibDems who have a single principle remaining - take the bit between their teeth and actually do something! The first thing they need to do is shrug off the shackles of the Coalition - it will do them no favours, in the long run!

On to more mundane but feline centred matters!! My attention was drawn to something about old Larrykins in the papers! Yes, Larry upstairs, the pampered moggy who runs a mile if he sees a mouse's whiskers twitch - is to be the focus of a special quiz night in the State Rooms!!!! And what is the purpose of this quiz night? It is nothing more nor less than the raising of funds, by the Downing Street staff, to pay for Larry's keep!! The staff and presumably 'Boy David' said he would not be a drain on the 'public purse'. Can you believe it?

Every self-respecting cat provides for him or herself! Admittedly, the odd sardine and bowl of milk - a dash of cream and a piece of chicken breast - do not come amiss. But Arturo and I catch our own rats - and I cannot tell a lie - there are loads of rats running round Downing Street - some even have two legs.

'Bye'

999 ... Which service do you require? @ No 10

All the fun of the fair today! Parliament returns! Whoopee! But hang on ... what's the reason to celebrate?

So many sound bites are emanating from the mouths of the 'babes and sucklings' who are the Coalition government that Arturo and I were quite dizzy. Each was vying with the other to get the best phrase out and hence the best headline in tomorrow's papers. Childish - yes - typical of the PR brigade - yes!

Sadly, as Arturo explained to me, the phrases often hide dire consequences for the humans - particularly those who live in England. The Welsh, the Scots and the Irish seem to have a tad more sense about the really big issues. For instance the NHS!

The House of Commons have been granted a few hours of debate on the 1000+ amendments to the Health and Social Care Bill. Each amendment carries a potential pitfall! But the time limit will prevent detailed questioning of the wily Old Fox, Lansley Secretary of State. 'Boy David' Cameron is a believer in Action Man tactics - he likes the idea of railroading changes through the House! No doubt, in his sleep, he hears the theme tune of Raiders of the Lost Ark and sees himself cracking the bull-whip. It must bring back memories of his Bullingdon Club misspent youth!

So - to go back to the title of this post ... 999 ... Which service do you require? We can already state - that should this notorious Bill get through the House, this week - then England is one stage closer to having one of its three emergency services privatised. The mind boggles at the response to a future 999 call. It could go something like this:

"Emergency ... What service do you require ... Ambulance? Well - we can offer you one that will take you to your nearest private hospital .... Are you covered by insurance ... No? Oh Dear! We have no ambulances available, for the next hour, to take you to your nearest available NHS A & E. All NHS A & E clinics in your area are overloaded. What was that .... You'll get your neighbour to drive you? Wise decision ... Have a good day!"

Of course, this is what Arturo has termed 'the nightmare scenario'. But watch this space!

The other two emergency services: the police and fire brigade - now surely they must be safe. Not so! In March this year - our Hush Puppy Man, Ken Clarke, he of the smooth voice and the whiff of cigars, privatised Birmingham prison. Yes! That's right! Birmingham prison is to be run by private security company G4S from October! No doubt G4S reckon they could do a passable job at running the police service as well - watch this space!

"And what" asked Arturo, "is the main function of a private company? ..." Before I could answer, he replied to his own question. "It is to make a profit! That's its main purpose!"

And thereby lies the rub! If the word 'private' is put before any of the three 'Emergency' services - it surely means profit comes dancing in and service goes cringing out!

Well - at least the Fire service is OK! Is that what you are saying to yourself? Well, well, well! Have I got news for you!

As you can imagine - being a firefighter is not an easy job. It requires training and re-training - to keep up-to-date with the latest techniques. This week, the government announced that it is exploring greater private involvement in the running of the Fire Service College. The London Fire Brigade training contract with the Fire Service College is said to be worth several million pounds a year.

Now - three private companies – Serco, Babcock and Capital Training Solutions – are vying with each other to obtain the contract to provide the training for firefighters. The training programme is complex and the three bidders do not appear to be experts in providing such courses. Nothing daunted - the Coalition government is still continuing with the process and putting a highly positive spin on it.

So there you have it! Dial 999 in a couple of years down the line and you will be met by a catchy jingle inviting you to choose your 'private' provider!

However - my friends - all is not quite lost. Tonight a new Boudicca arose - not on a chariot but on her own two feet! Who is this young fearless Queen of the Iceni? One petite, dark haired, young lady. Arturo and I watched her on the tele - in the Health and Social Care Bill debate tonight. She is Liz Kendall, Shadow Health Minister, Labour MP for Leicester West. Arturo nearly fell off his cushion, jumping up and down with delight, as he listened to her speech. All he could say was: "What a woman! She'll show 'em!"

I must say, I was impressed too. She spoke with flare and passion. Here was no PR speech! Here was evidence of someone who actually believed in what she was saying. Ranged opposite her were the rows of Coalition ministers and MPs - including the old Silver Fox Lansley.

If there are more like Liz Kendall - then perhaps in a couple of years' time, when you dial 999 - you will still hear:

"Emergency .. Which service do you require?"

'Bye' from Arturo

'Bye' from me

'Don't feed the fat cats' @ No 10

I saw several people with banners saying 'Don't feed the Fat Cats'! I looked at myself in the mirror and decided I certainly wasn't 'fat'. I trotted over to No 11 to see Arturo. He looked pretty lean to me!

"Where and who are these 'fat cats', Arturo, mi old pal?" I asked him, the fount of all knowledge.

"Are you daft, Butch? 'Fat cats' are not the feline kind like you and me! They're the rich, the toffs, the bankers - the two legged variety called humankind! They are the 'fat cats'. You want to keep well away from them - they're no good to you or me."

I returned to No 10, once again amazed by my pal's perspicacity. What a cat that Arturo is - a veritable Daniel!

It was as I entered No 10 that I heard one of the Interns complaining about the 'bad press' that Old Fox Lansley and 'Boy David' Cameron were getting about the Health and Social Care Bill . He said how unfair it was! He particularly fussed about Baroness Shirley Williams and her comments.

I decided to do my own investigating on the web. And did I strike gold - or did I strike gold! First - I found a site called 38 Degrees (http://www.38degrees.org.uk) This gave facts and figures about the new reforms of the NHS. There is also a petition to sign.

Then, I discovered Spinwatch (http://www.spinwatch.org/). This gave loads of details on this this video :

The Health Industry Lobbying Tour from Mancha Productions on Vimeo.

At the end - my head was reeling! I knew that the Old Fox Lansley had friends in high places but I didn't know he also knew 'fat cats'. It seems, 'Boy David' also has 'fat cat' acquaintances too! I wonder whether 'Wailing Lad' Clegg has met any - can't be sure about him or his connections. However, he did agree to the Health and Social Care Bill - and that was very, very odd.

Now - my friends - I have a theory. Old Fox, Boy David and Wailing Lad have all been in the PR business. They are now politicians of high rank. However, they were so conditioned as trainee PR blokes that the conditioning has become embedded in their tiny brains (as you know I always choose my adjectives advisedly!).

So what has this conditioning got to do with 'fat cats', do I hear you ask? Let me offer one possible explanation. Fat cats have only one goal in life - to get fatter! To achieve this end they will :
*** say anything
*** do anything
The private healthcare companies - many of them from the US - employed scheming lobbyists whose ability is to convince politicians, 'by any means', of the of the rightness of their cause.

Now - the three stooges: Cameron, Lansley and Clegg were fair game - poor blokes!. They just wanted to be able to utter a good sound bite! After all - it's really the only thing they are any good at doing! The lobbyists give them the sound bite - they each in turn uttered it - without actually looking at the full meaning of the words they were saying. Their main concern was: 'Do I look alright?'

Hey Presto! We now have the Health and Social Care Bill waiting to fulfill the aspirations of the private health companies - the privatisation of the NHS with all the lovely dosh going their way! The fat cats were purring with delight and drooling at the prospect.

And that luscious prospect is still there - only Parliament stands in the way.

"Butch! Butch! C'mon, honey, I've got a nice sardine for your supper!" I heard the dulcet tones of my pal among the secretaries - maybe being a fat cat isn't such a dreadful prospect after all!

'Bye'

The NHS ship is sinking fast @ No 10

As if there haven't been enough crass stories this summer by various members of the Coalition - another one hits the headlines that makes the others fade into insignificance. And what can this be, do I hear you ask. Is 'Apple Schnapps' Shapps up to his tricks again? Is Bagpuss Pickles still causing havoc? Is the Weasel man ferreting around? No! None of these. It's the most slippery one of the lot - the old Silver Fox himself who is causing mayhem - once again.

It is the NHS Health Reform Bill that is setting hearts a fluttering and pulses a jumping. It seems the Baroness Shirley Williams can no longer keep silent - Thank goodness for that - She has exposed the real truth behind the so-called 1000 changes to the original Bill.

You will recall that in an earlier post (The Name of the Game @ No 10) - Arturo and I showed the ridiculous changes that had been made. They were not REAL CHANGES but NAME CHANGES!

Now on the Guardian web site, Toby Helm, the Observer's Political Editor, has written about the revelations that will be in Sunday's Observer newspaper. Secret emails show that some 10 - 20 hospitals will be run by overseas companies, after they have submitted their tenders - if this Bill gets through Parliament. Don't recall hearing the Old Fox Lansley telling us about that! Do you?

Also, Baroness Shirley Williams has expressed her great concern about something that has always been at the very core of the NHS - since its inception : that the secretary of state is bound to deliver "a comprehensive health service for the people of England, free at the point of need". Baroness Williams thinks that the reforms could possibly undermine this! Don't recall hearing the Old Fox Lansley telling us about that! Do you?

Now - Baroness Williams is a Liberal Democrat Peer. She has always stood behind their leader Nick Clegg - known to readers of this Blog as 'Wailing Lad' Clegg because of his constant miseries! Well, this 'Wailing Lad' may well have given everybody else good reason to wail now. Recently, he repeated his mantra :

"Yes to reform of the NHS, but no to the privatisation of the NHS."

Now - it seems that the new Health Bill is nothing more nor less than privatisation by stealth. The emails that Baroness Williams will reveal in tomorrow's Observer quite clearly show the duplicity of both 'Boy David' Cameron and the Old Fox Lansley and quite possibly of 'Wailing Lad' Clegg - unless of course, he was kept out in the cold and neither saw nor heard the evil that was being perpetrated.

Understandably the Unions are not happy at the prospect of international companies scheming to get their hands on 10 - 20 of the NHS hospitals. A spokesman for the public service union Unison said:

Regardless of what Cameron and Clegg say in public, it is clear that behind the scenes the government is planning to privatise the NHS. Private companies will only run hospitals if they see a profit in it. This, together with lifting the cap off the number of private patients NHS hospitals can treat, will completely change the culture of the NHS. It will be profits before patients. We demand that the government come clean on their plans. If this is true, patient choice is a complete sham. The move to any qualified provider is clearly about creating a market for private companies. Any MP who votes for the health and social care bill is voting for the end of the NHS.

Now those of you with a long memory will recall that Shirley Williams - as she then was - was a staunch and campaigning Labour MP - before leaving the Party. She is not able to shrug off her old, strongly held Labour principles. She said, in her article:

The remarkable vision of the 1945 Attlee government, of a public service free at the point of need for all the people of England, should not be allowed to die.

Now - I'm only an under stairs cat, as you know! But what I've seen, heard and smelt under the Downing Street stairs has been, as Arturo says 'Somethin' awful!'. This, however, makes even the rotting rat-hole under the front door smell sweet! Why can't the Coalition be honest and say:

** We want to privatise the NHS.

** We want to allow competition to run services to be opened up to International companies who are purely interested in making loads of dosh.

** We want private companies, wishing to tender, to be able to do so when local GP commissioners, renamed Clinical Care Groups (CCGs), find they cannot deal effectively - under the new constraints - with a particular service.

** We want to remove the cap on private beds in NHS hospitals - often these are wealthy foreign patients - thus again - opening up the NHS to private companies who want to maximise profits.

Why didn't the Old Fox and the fresh faced 'Boy David' say these things? It's obvious! They'd never have been voted in! The British - be they English, Welsh, Scots or Irish - love their NHS and they would tear limb from limb any party that said it would put it into the hands of private companies.

Whatever else 'Boy David' and the Old Fox are - they are both PR men to the tips of their fingers. They both love smarming down their hair, donning their fake tans, walking the walk and talking the talk! And Boy Oh Boy - do they know how to do it!! They'd be a great vaudeville act :

"I say, I say, I say, Prime Minister! How do we destroy the NHS and bring in those lovely private companies?"

"I don't know. How do we destroy the NHS and bring in those lovely private companies, Secretary of State?"

"By just doing it and not telling anyone! The people will never notice!"

And that, my friends, is the truth of it. The MPs have not had the time to scrutinise the 1000 phoney amendments. The rest of the people have been lulled into a stupor.

Arturo and I are just glad we're a couple of cats who stay at the great facilities of the the RSPCA and The Blue Cross - we don't need no NHS! But I don't give much for the chances of the average Brit - in the years to come!

'Bye'

The Grand Old Duke of York marches @ No 10

I had hoped for a nap, this morning - had a long night's rat-catching the previous night! There seemed to be loads of them. But the commotion at about 9:30 am woke me up with a start! "Oh No!" I heard someone wail. "They're really making cuts to the Army and the Air Force! I don't believe it!" I peered over the top of the desk on which a large monitor was flashing:

Sir Mike Jackson says forces cuts put capability at risk

(http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk) The BBC website showed a video of Sir Mike Jackson looking grim indeed. And he had every reason to look grim, as he said. "The Defence force personnel cuts may put the UK's future military capability at risk," He went on to say:

The defence review laid out a force structure to be achieved by 2020. Between now and then there are some risks being taken. For example, we will not have a carrier strike capability for the next eight/nine years or so. I'm assured that the arithmetic will balance out in terms of manpower and commitments but of course we live in an uncertain world, no-one forecast, for example, the commitment to Libya which has taken place over the last few months and there will be other unforeseen eventualities I have no doubt.

He wasn't the only person to voice his concern. Jim Murphy MP, Labour's shadow defence secretary, commented:

The government's decision to cut the deficit too far and a rushed defence review which cut too fast means frontline forces are being sacked. Our forces perform heroics and must be treated accordingly. Ground crew who are essential for frontline RAF operations and army personnel who may serve in Afghanistan in future are being sacked today. The country will be hurt that brave Ghurkhas, championed by David Cameron in opposition, are also being made compulsorily redundant. In a world of uncertainty it is worrying that ministers' decisions are leading to Britain's strategic shrinkage by stealth.

Another person who has indicated her grave concern is Catherine Spencer, of the Army Families Federation. She said it was a very difficult time for families.

All Army families are going to be concerned about whether or not their soldier will be made redundant.

Nothing daunted, the Coalition had two poker-faced men announcing that their policies were well judged and calculated. One was Liam Fox, Defence Secretary. He smiled and implied he had everything - but everything - under control. Maybe, when he was a doctor, he used the same bedside manner - intended to comfort and reassure when the person addressed felt far from comfortable! He does have the 'manner' as they say. And what did our understanding Doc Liam Fox have to say - why comforting words no less:

Of course redundancies are always sad news, but we will continue to have strong and capable forces and we appreciate the hard work of our brave armed forces.

Hang on! Thanks for nothing, mate! I'm sure those who've just been 'sacked' for that is what has happened, are not exactly thrilled that Doc Fox appreciates their 'hard work'. What about the poor blokes and lasses who've just lost their jobs? What about them?

** Are you, Doc Fox, going to personally ensure that they and their families get the sort of golden handshakes that the bankers received?

** Are you, personally, going to ensure that those who have to move - and pronto - from their service personnel housing - will be provided with a housing package?

** Are you, personally, Doc Fox, going to find a decent, well-paid job for the soldiers and airmen who have risked their lives for the safety of this country? Or will you close your eyes as they line up at the - laughably named - Job Centres. Because, as we know there AREN'T ANY JOBS!

** Are you, personally, Doc Fox, going to see that those of them being cast out, by these cuts, will have counselling - should they need it?

I'm sure this Doc Fox is a decent chap, has been a good doctor and has a conscience - but I'm equally sure he cannot guarantee a 'Yes' response to any of the above queries.

Next up - rushing to the support of this drastic - daft - Defence policy of this rash Coalition was Forces Minister, Nick Harvey. You could tell he was vaguely queasy when he appeared on BBC TV. His eyebrows had the disconcerting ability to shoot up, then down, like a pair of demented hairy caterpillars unsure of their location. However, like the good little mouthpiece he is, nothing daunted - Liberal Democrat though he be! - Our Nicholas Barton Harvey, MP for North Devon, declared that the redundancies will be given face-to-face along the chain of command. Well, that's really great! He then blamed the Labour Government's 'grim inheritance'. Tut tut! Mr Harvey - one day you may be in coaliton with Labour - then what will you say: "It was the Tories what made me do it, honest Gov!"

I just bet that when the Defence Management Journal published the following comment about Nick Harvey

The Liberal Democrats probably have the best defence policy at the moment. Nick Harvey is one of the most knowledgeable MPs on defence subjects outside of government and always has something to say

They had no idea that he was to support such dramatic cuts!

But as Arturo says with great regularity; "C'est la vie, mi old pal! C'est la vie! If you sup with the Devil - you need a long spoon!"

Trouble is - Arturo won't tell me who the Devil is!!!

'Bye'