The French have a word for it @ No10

Jolly hols are over for now for Boy David, Wailing Lad Clegg, Mop-head Boris! They are all back here - not sure where Georgy is though. Arturo says he's bound to be back for the recall of Parliament - wouldn't want to miss out.

Maybe, I'm a cynical cat! Maybe! But they did need to come back, didn't they? So now, they are 'pressing the flesh' as the Americans say! They're also talking to COBRA - we don't like the sound of that! Snakes are not favourites with Arturo and me!

But what's to do? Use water cannon? Use rubber bullets? Stop all police leave?

My answer is 'set a good example'. Simple really, make sure the bankers pay up for all the damage they caused to the country as a whole - tax their bonuses till they squeak! Bring down the rate of VAT - it hits the poorest worse than the middle classes. Restore the full EMA to get the rioting kids back on vocational courses; open up new youth clubs and sports grounds; clean up TV shown on mainstream channels; allow teachers to exert proper control in classrooms by cutting out this political correctness mania.

Above all else - stop politicians speaking like public relations employees and get them to begin to talk with belief and true conviction.

Adults are fed up with being fed electioneering hog-wash from all three main parties! Teenagers are even more perceptive and have become disillusioned with the adults around them.

My friend Phillippe from Paris, once rescued from Battersea - then taken to a splendid apartment overlooking the Seine, was due to come to London this week. Arturo and I were excited at the prospect of seeing him again! Then, today we heard he could not come. Why? The French foreign office issued a travel warning against making avoidable visits to Britain. Can you believe it! The French - I ask you!

How delighted the French foreign office must have been! Phillippe would not be able to come to see Nelson's column again and marvel at his great Trafalgar victory! He would not be arriving at Waterloo and pay silent respect to the Duke of Wellington! (I do trust you get the irony - I'm sure Napoleon would have!)

Meanwhile, Arturo heard that the Iranian Government have issued a statement making a plea that British police officers should stop attacking UK citizens. Enough said - no comment needed!

Remember those orphan kittens, I told you I was looking after them - well I must go to check that they're not ripping up the curtains, stealing milk from the pantry or pinching Boy David's caviar! These youngsters - who knows what they're up to, these days! Must be more disciplined with them!

'Bye'